The Gene Pool

I am constantly amazed that Anna and Miss Ellie can come from the same gene pool but have huge differences (as well as some similarities)

The similarities include the fact that both of my baby daughters seem to be full of lots of smiles. As a baby, it was constantly remarked how smiley and content Anna was and, in fact, everyone says the same about Miss Ellie. On a recent holiday to Cornwall, I wasn't happy as Miss Ellie seemed a little unsettled. I couldn't put my finger on it but she just seemed to be too wriggly! I said that I would take her for a walk as I wanted to settle her. Everyone just looked at me in amazement saying "Not content??? Most mum's would love to have a baby 'not content' if that is what it involved". Up to 6 months old, I could also say that Anna and Miss Ellie were very similar looking although I think Miss Ellie is starting to look more 'Gibson' while Anna is a real mix of the two.

Before highlighting the differences, I need to state that both my daughters are beautiful in every way but different!

Anna, even as a baby, was incredibly focussed. Nothing or nobody would stop her drinking her milk until it was all gone. Miss Ellie only needs to see a flicker of light in the corner of her eye and milk is forgotten!

Anna, from 6 months old, would gaze intently at her bedtime story, trying to turn the pages and smiling at my silly voices. Miss Ellie, apart from books involving Farm animals, will look at anything but the book including, for example, a bit of fluff on the carpet tonight.

Anna just fell into a routine as though it from textbook. I could put her to sleep for her daytime nap and she would instantly fall asleep, waking 2 hours later with a smile on her face and ready for action. Miss Ellie fights sleep until she looks like her eyes are about to fall out but she still won't give in! Even if I struggle for hours to get her to sleep, she will only catnap for 10 minutes maximum before waking up and then getting grumpy half an hour later. The only solution is taking Miss Ellie out in the car but, with petrol prices, I'm not sure I can do that every day! It would cost me a small forune, even if it does save my sanity! Anna was such an easy baby in comparison!

Anna was always hugely independent and still is, wanting to discover everything for herself and not letting people help her if she thought she could do it herself. However, when Anna discovered the DVD player would open by pressing certain buttons, I gave a stern but friendly 'No' and Anna would not touch it again.  Miss Ellie discovered the DVD player this week but instead of getting the message that it probably isn't a good idea (despite me moving her 10 feet away for the 100th time), I turn around to discover that she has opened the DVD drawer and is attempting to climb up onto it to get to the TV! If I give her a look to try and show my disapproval, Anna would just instinctively know. Miss Ellie just looks at me and laughs before attempting it again! Miss Ellie is definitely a monkey!!! However, you can't help but melt as soon as you saw that wicked but trely gorgeous smile, the glint in her eye and that look to say 'I know I'm a monkey but you love me'.

I have my vision for the future already...

Anna will be the incredibly bright, so beautiful, geeky daughter of mine who will watch Newsnight, eat granola for Breakfast and read the Times

Miss Ellie will be the incredibly streetwise, so gorgeous, cool daughter who is easily lead and relies on her mother to get her out of trouble. She will probably watch Eastenders, eat Frosties for breakfast and read Heat magazine.

Of course, there is every chance that I am completely wrong and I won't care as long as they are happy. Despite their differences, I always will adore them both equally, even if they make me turn grey before 40!!!

Anna and Cubey

Anyone who has ever met Anna, knows Cubey. They quickly come to understand his importance and it is not long before everyone is referring to Cubey as a significant figure (It is hard not to, once you understand the relationship with Anna). For historical purposes (if reading this in 20 years time), I will explain to you what he is. He used to be a soft toy in the shape of a cube with a face drawn on one side, a ladybird on the other, a red silk side and the rest escapes me. He no longer resembles a cube at all but just a rather squashed, floppy soft 'thing' which looks amazingly grubby (even when just washed) and has started to get holes... lots of holes. On bad days, he can start to smell too!! Considering he never leaves Anna's side (She even smuggles him to school. The teacher has given up trying to stop him from going and, one day, when Anna fell in the playground, the teacher called out 'Can someone go and get Cubey from Anna's drawer' (Anna hadn't even asked for him on the occasion!)

Cubey has been constantly by her side since 3 days old when she was introduced to him in her cot. I have not the faintest idea why Anna suddenly became attached to him in the way that she did but it happened and, from that day on, Cubey has always been there.

He literally goes everywhere! In fact, we don't even notice him now. We go on day trips to Alton Towers or the Seaside and, unbeknown to us, he has gone on all the rides or been carried around in the bucket all day. Cubey can even be seen in EVERY family members professional wedding photo album, at least once (It is just lucky that we have such understanding family!!).

Cubey and Anna - Inseparable at 10 months old

On a recent holiday to Cornwall, someone said 'I'm a little worried, Anna never ever has Cubey more than 10cm away from her' and, when I stopped to think about it, it's true. Don't get me wrong, there have been days when Cubey has been left behind or Anna just hasn't been able to take him (her recent bodyboarding session in Cornwall was one example) and there is an acceptance about that from Anna but, if chosen, Cubey is always there! On the rare occasions when Anna has become unaware of Cubey's whereabouts, instant panic ensues until we find him.  

Anna adores Cubey as much as she would a family member and, being her constant companion since 3 days old, you can possibly see why! He has been there on her first day at pre-school and primary, been there when she was admitted into hospital, been there when we moved house and when we go to new places.

Anna and Cubey as Bridesmaids at Uncle Steve's Wedding

Cubey has had to endure a great deal. Being placed on public toilet floors was challenging (and quickly stopped for hygiene reasons) and being smuggled into school daily for the last 6 months hasn't been easy. We dare not even mention the time that Cubey got stuck between the netting at the local playbarn and the death threats, such as cooking him on the bbq or sending him out to sea tied to a bottle (mentioning no names Uncle Matthew and Grandma Lynn) was nearly a step too far for poor Cubey to cope with. However, he has remained strong and brave in such difficulties, always there for Anna!  

It is amazing to see the instant calm that falls on Anna when she picks him up. If she is upset or panicked, Cubey provides whatever calm she needs if we are not around. In fact, I think I have always taken Cubey for granted. Now that I am having major battles with Miss Ellie's sleep (she refuses to do it unless rocked, sung to or patted), I underestimated the magic that Cubey produced every daytime nap and night time. Anna would be laid in her cot, clutching Cubey and cuddling up to him, Anna would instantly fall asleep. No crying, no screaming, no restlessness. With Cubey by her side, instant calm! In fact, I remember the moment when I realised that Cubey had such magic powers when, at only a few weeks old, Anna wouldn't settle. I ran through a huge list in my head of reasons it might be... too warm, too cold, dirty nappy, hungry etc. It dawned on me that there was no Cubey and once I picked him up and nestled it into her - Anna fell asleep instantly. Little did I know then that 5 and half years on, it would be the same story.

However, times have changed and Cubey is sick!!!!

Despite going on the operating table several times and having undergone several major surgical operations involving needle and thread, Cubey has become inoperable. Surgeon Nanny has had to admit defeat and so Cubey is now looking very tired and grey with his stuffing hanging out (sounds like me on a bad day!!!).

Cubey sledging on Christmas day 2010

The time has come to leave Cubey at home, convalescing in bed whilst Anna is at school. I fear that being surrounded by some rowdy 5 year old's would be the death of Cubey and we have to treat him very gently nowadays. After having several heartfelt discussions with Anna (after all, she is entering Year 1), it has been agreed that Cubey will be tucked into bed each morning by Anna and will wait patiently for her return. Of course, they will miss each other terribly but I hope time can be healing and, over several weeks/months (surely not years???), they can both learn to live without each other during school hours.

Cubey in Cornwall 2012 (looking very old!!)

So, as Anna embarks on a new adventure as she starts Year 1 tomorrow, a new chapter also begins for her and Cubey as they are separated each day. I'm not sure who is going to crack first... Cubey (although he is technically already cracked/torn in several hundred places already), Anna, Anna's teacher or me!!